Navigating Client-Therapist Communication in the World of Massage: A Light-Hearted Reflection

As a Lomi Lomi massage practitioner and teacher, I’ve encountered a myriad of fascinating text conversations with clients and potential clients over the years. It’s all part of the journey, right?

Today, I’d like to delve into a specific type of interaction – those messages that make you pause and think:

“Hi, I like your website, are you offering also the full body massage, you know the one with a happy ending?”

“Hi, do you do any other services along those lines? I can keep my mouth shut.”

“Hi, Can you visit our home to do a massage on all our glutes mainly? Male bodybuilders”

It’s a bit like asking a plumber to fix your leaky roof or expecting a dentist to have all the answers for issues with your stomach – quite far from their area of expertise. Yet, it seems that the association between massage and sexuality is a frequent misunderstanding.

My fellow massage therapists and bodyworkers from various modalities often share similar experiences. Inquiries like “I’m seeking a personal experience ending in a tantric-style orgasm,” or “I’m interested in a massage with a ‘happy ending,'” or “Do you also offer THAT kind of whole body massage?” arrive, no matter how detailed our webpages, brochures, or advertisements may be.

It’s my hope to encourage a little maturity and clarity in our communication. If you’re in pursuit of erotic or tantric services, it’s absolutely acceptable to express your needs openly. Take the direct route and look for the services that match your desires on the internet. In New Zealand, such services are legal and accessible. So why not search for “sexual services,” “erotic massage,” or “tantric experiences” directly? You’ll find numerous dedicated professionals ready to meet your needs. There’s no need to veil your request behind vague terminology like “THIS kind of massage” and misdirect it to a massage therapist who doesn’t offer the services you’re seeking.

The solution is simple: it’s all about clear communication, respect, and mature behaviour.

I should mention that some of my female therapist friends have chosen to provide services exclusively to women, primarily to sidestep these tricky communications with potential clients, often feeling sexually harassed by such inquiries. However, I have opted for a different approach. I don’t believe in discriminating against an entire gender due to the behaviour of a few. Instead, I patiently respond to these messages, directing the individuals to my website and making an effort to ‘educate’ the authors.

Clear communication and mutual respect are the foundations of any harmonious exchange. This holds even greater importance within the intimate sphere of massage, bodywork, and touch. If you ever find yourself uncertain about what a massage or any other service entails, I encourage you to explore the website or ask questions. In doing so, use clear and respectful communication, rather than resorting to cryptic words or phrases that reveal your disrespect and immaturity when seeking adult-oriented services.

With love and respect to all our needs 😊
i.

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